Dear Alpha Delt, Way to Be “Ivygated”

13 03 2010

In what has already been a horrendous semester for Greek System public relations, Alpha Delta Phi had once again managed to prove that it is still possible to set new lows. Someone leaked a pledge lineup and some nice little hazing activities to the Ivygate tabloid blog. If this is anything like Pi Phi’s fiasco, then this should attract enough attention that you guys will be meeting with the OFSA any day now. Have fun with those sanctions you’re about to get.

Quoting Ivygate:

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: “redacted” <redacted>
Date: Mar 4, 2010 11:42 AM
Subject: LINEUP TONIGHT
To: <alphadeltaphipledges2010@googlegroups.com>

Its that time again boys, with new rules.

Be at the bottom of Alpha Delta Phi Drive at 9:10 PM tonight, and each of us must have:
-1 pack of cigs
-1 lighter
-gum
-2 quarters
-a helmet and a cup (as in the kind lacrosse and hockey players wear)
-shaving cream
-porn (can be magazine or video… extra points if you find Pirates 2 (can be downloaded and burned))
-Dog food
-either a 6-pack of beer or a bottle of liquor/wine (should be something YOU want to drink)
-Protocol attire, but WEAR SNEAKERS

The pledge class as a whole must have these items:
-1 LARGE bottle of tabasco sauce
-2 cases of beer (NOT keystone)
-2 live small goldfish

Figure this shit out ASAP.  Everyone should probably give Shep money to buy the booze.
Guys should also take the bus to Dick’s to get anything sporting-related

-(Author name redacted)

And the debrief:

Okay, so….
I can tell you what alpha delta phi did with everything.
They made their pledges chug mixtures of dogfood, tabasco sauce, and sour cream.
They then proceeded to fill the great halls of their manor with flour, beer, and water, and made their pledges run relay races drunk while they pelted them with dodgeballs.
Then, they made them run naked laps outside the house.
(And, of course, there was the line up).

***

So Alpha Delt, let me pose two questions: who did you piss off, and how much ass-kissing do you think it will take to fix this debacle. Even our Dean of Students, Alpha Delt Alum Kent Hubbell ’69, has got to be shaking his head in embarrassment right now (less because of the hazing, more for the fact you were outed by a tabloid blog about the Ivy League).


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